Quote Archive

"Mom, you're not on the same page as me."
"Correct me if I'm wrong..."
Two phrases Sidney has recently started using correctly in conversation.

"Why do they call them chocolate chips? They should call them chocolate mountains because that is what they look like."
Sidney, while baking with Mom. Take note, Nestle!

"Daddy, when will you teach me how to drive?"
It has already started, and she is just turning 5!

"Daddy, why are you teaching me these things?"
Sidney's response after I told her what a social networking website for dogs is.

"Mommy, you call me a Jatta all the time."(Pronounced "yo-to" in Norwegian, the name of an area near us.)
"No, Sidney, I call you a yo-yo."

"You do the blog so people can see the funny things I say."
Sidney, stating the obvious.

"The Earth is the biggest planet in the whole world."
We are going to have to go over that astronomy thing with Sidney again.

"Daddy, did you shave your beard so we wouldn't have to see the white?"

"The Germans beat the Danish. I saw it on t.v."

"In what, football?"

"No, war."

Sidney on world history.


"What do you think he is doing?

"Fishing. He has a fishing pole."

Sidney commenting on the silhouette of a little boy peeing on the side of a public pissoir.



"And that's their barbecue grill they take outside to barbecue with."

Sidney, referring to a roll-top desk in the Royal Apartments in Stockholm.


Sidney’s first joke she made up herself:

The toilet in our cabin flushed loudly because it was on a vacuum system. Kimber flushed it while Sidney was standing beside it, and Sidney said, “That is EAR-ritating!” while tugging her ear.


“Polar bears eat people straight away. They don’t peel them first.”

Sidney describing polar bear eating habits.


“When you eat your food, it goes down to your tummy and turns into throw-up.”

Digestion 101 by Sidney.


“I want to lick you off.”

Sidney, attesting to the fact that Mommy’s hand tasted good after swimming in the salt water.


“Troll (the name of a dessert they served on the trip) is cooked trolls.”

More cooking lessons from Sidney.


“When you have blood in your eyes, does that mean there are little cracks in them?”

Since we were in the midnight sun and up late, we apparently had bloodshot eyes from the lack of sleep.


“You mean you only get one bite from all that?”

Sidney, after eating a crawfish.

"I really, really like blueberry yogurt. Oh, I don't like this one."
"Why not?"
"Too many blueberries."
Sidney to Ms. Rasen while shopping.

"I like Chinese food."
"What's your favorite Chinese food?"
"French fries."
Sidney on international cuisine.

"Hey, Mommy, you could wear your red pants and that red sweater on Halloween as an Elmo costume."
Sidney commenting on Kimber's fashion.

"Daddy, what's interesting about a seahorse is that daddies have a hole."
Sidney is apparently learning some anatomy.

"You know, Grandma, I've tasted lots of animals."
"And how were they?"
"Good."
Sidney attesting to the fact that she is definitely not a vegetarian.

"You can't just throw him from the 7th floor down to the sea. You see, snails can't fly."
Sidney's response to me when I told her the snail she and Grandpa brought up to the apartment was going to need to go back outside.

"Mommy, it's hill, not Hell."
Sidney, correcting Kimber after she made a satirical reference to a portion of her recent bike race.

"Ms. Rasen, I need to come stay at your house again because Daddy needs peace."
Sidney, to her teacher.

"Did you have fun seeing the queen?"
"Yes, but Ms. Rasen spoils me."
Sidney, referring to her overnight trip with her teacher to see the Queen of Norway

"I'll have to bring her a red mat because she really likes red mats."
Sidney, when I told her she will be going to an event next week and possibly see the Queen of Norway.

"...Easter eggs, handmade by chickens..."
"...The Aquarium will give you a chance to see Adriatic sea life without having to eat it. Children will like it; animal rights activists may be less impressed."
Quotes from the Dubrovnik in your Pocket travel guide.

"Fine, I'll just sit on the ball and lay it like an egg."
Sidney, after being told not to throw her ball inside.

"I think we need an idea here, Daddy. I have an idea, but I don't think you do."
Sidney to me during a snowman building competition.

"I have another homonym - turkey and turkey. Turkey like I eat and turkey like I am."
Sidney to her kindergarten teacher, Ms. Rasen.

"He was looking at the ground with a clue mirror."
Sidney describing a picture of a boy looking through a magnifying glass.

"Mom, you have two eyes, not three like an alien."
Sidney's response to Kimber saying she has eyes everywhere and can see her being naughty.

"I know two more homonyms - bow and Bo. Bow as in your hair and Bo, the boy from my class in Findlay."
Sidney discussing homonyms.

"Mom, that white bra is way too big for you."
Sidney, referring to a sports bra in a sporting goods store, loud enough for EVERYONE to hear.

"That lady has pasta hair."
Sidney, referring to some supermodel on television with curly blond hair.

"Does it feel soft when I'm holding the menagerie against your legs?"
Sidney, referring to her stuffed animal collection, which we refer to as her "menagerie"