I have called 7 or 8 places to look for a place for Kirk and have struck out on all. Either they are post acute rehab or far out of my price range and too active or large for Kirk. I have a call into one more possibility but then I will have run through all of my ideas and the ones you all have provided. I'm still working with the VA to try to get him into a Veteran Foster home but I haven't had success yet. I also will start to look at smaller assisted living homes around. I a also attended a family meeting to discuss ideas to salvage Rainbow House but I am afraid it won't be successful. I am scared and sad and unsure again about the future.
On a lighter note Sidney went to bug camp this week. I'll have to get the pictures of her holding a tarantula and snake. She had a great time and wants to do it again next year. We are currently in Corpus Christi for a swim meet. She swam three events today and was faster in each. It was a long day. We were at the pool at 6:30 and left at 4:30, tired and hungry. We don't have to be as early tomorrow but also don't know when we can head home. She's in at least three more events.
We head to Peru Friday. We are looking forward to the trip. We are packed if you consider all our stuff piled on the living room table to be packed. I need to figure out what I'll stuff it all into.
I'll try to get a post up before we leave. Please don't stop praying or thinking of ideas.
Saturday, August 1, 2015
Tuesday, July 21, 2015
Square One
These have been tough weeks. I went to Houston last week in part to deliver the tandem back to where we bought it so it can be sold. We were the family that biked together to stay together. So many happy times happened on bikes. I hope that the lovely bike with rainbow wheels built for our family will make another family happy memories.
I did get Sidney back while I was there and we went to Space Center with a few of Sidney's friends and we had a nice dinner out. We went to church in Katy and headed back to San Antonio.
Sidney swam all week last week. 4 or so hours a day. She went to sleep really easy.
But onto the harder stuff. Our 17th anniversary was Saturday. It was very difficult. I miss Kirk so very much and I didn't.t tell him enough when it mattered how much I appreciated him.
Rainbow House, where Kirk has been living the last few months, will be closing in November. Most of the residents are on Medicare and the facility has not received increase in funding in many years while expenses continue to increase. In addition they have had turnover in staff at a high rate. And so they must close and 13 residents, including Kirk need to find a new home. Please pray. It was hard to find this place and we know what won't work. It seemed like we had found a place that was safe and could care for him. How do I find a new place? Please ask friends, look on the Internet, anything that you can think of. I am willing to try Houston and Austin if needed. I am tired and overwhelmed and just want the best for him. I am going to continue with the VA, talk to Alamo Head Injury and DARS and Kirk's Psychiatrist (more on that later). I'll take any idea.
Thank you again for standing by us. We could not go this alone.
I did get Sidney back while I was there and we went to Space Center with a few of Sidney's friends and we had a nice dinner out. We went to church in Katy and headed back to San Antonio.
Sidney swam all week last week. 4 or so hours a day. She went to sleep really easy.
But onto the harder stuff. Our 17th anniversary was Saturday. It was very difficult. I miss Kirk so very much and I didn't.t tell him enough when it mattered how much I appreciated him.
Rainbow House, where Kirk has been living the last few months, will be closing in November. Most of the residents are on Medicare and the facility has not received increase in funding in many years while expenses continue to increase. In addition they have had turnover in staff at a high rate. And so they must close and 13 residents, including Kirk need to find a new home. Please pray. It was hard to find this place and we know what won't work. It seemed like we had found a place that was safe and could care for him. How do I find a new place? Please ask friends, look on the Internet, anything that you can think of. I am willing to try Houston and Austin if needed. I am tired and overwhelmed and just want the best for him. I am going to continue with the VA, talk to Alamo Head Injury and DARS and Kirk's Psychiatrist (more on that later). I'll take any idea.
Thank you again for standing by us. We could not go this alone.
Sunday, July 5, 2015
Happy 4th of July
Without Sidney, things are pretty quiet. Stormy and I went on a long hike Friday. We were at the park early so other the the birds and butterflies we were alone until the end. We went to Government Canyon here in San Antonio. It was about a 20 minute drive for miles of trails. I wore good shoes but bad socks and ended up with impressive blisters. Stormy slept all day when we were done.
I went to two different friends on July 4. It was nice to have a break from the house. My one friend has four girls under the age of 5. It was not quiet but it was fun. I got home before fire works to make sure cat and dog were OK. They honestly couldn't care less about the fireworks.
Sunday has been a chill at home after church day. Life is going to get very busy again this week.
I got Kirk to the dentist this week. His teeth are in good shape. Nothing broken, no cavities. I will be taking him to a psychiatrist this week to try to get his mood stabilized a bit more. He is on a couple of medications that worked for a while but they aren't good for long term. The doctor we will be seeing specializes in head injuries.
I'll head to Houston on Friday to get Sidney. I'll also be taking the tandem to put on consignment and some tools to a friend. I am ready to get Sidney back. We are going to get some crab on Friday at Truluck's. We also will go to Space Center Houston for Sidney's birthday. A month early but it is the best time for us to be in Houston. We'll be going with her girl friend from Katy. Then church Sunday and back to San Antonio and the grind.
Sidney has a week full of swim lesson's next week and I have a bunch of work stuff that will keep me at work late one night and in early the next day so I am trying to find some help. It's turning out to be a little difficult. I hate having to ask for help all the time but I have to. I can't be in two places at once.
I went to two different friends on July 4. It was nice to have a break from the house. My one friend has four girls under the age of 5. It was not quiet but it was fun. I got home before fire works to make sure cat and dog were OK. They honestly couldn't care less about the fireworks.
Sunday has been a chill at home after church day. Life is going to get very busy again this week.
I got Kirk to the dentist this week. His teeth are in good shape. Nothing broken, no cavities. I will be taking him to a psychiatrist this week to try to get his mood stabilized a bit more. He is on a couple of medications that worked for a while but they aren't good for long term. The doctor we will be seeing specializes in head injuries.
I'll head to Houston on Friday to get Sidney. I'll also be taking the tandem to put on consignment and some tools to a friend. I am ready to get Sidney back. We are going to get some crab on Friday at Truluck's. We also will go to Space Center Houston for Sidney's birthday. A month early but it is the best time for us to be in Houston. We'll be going with her girl friend from Katy. Then church Sunday and back to San Antonio and the grind.
Sidney has a week full of swim lesson's next week and I have a bunch of work stuff that will keep me at work late one night and in early the next day so I am trying to find some help. It's turning out to be a little difficult. I hate having to ask for help all the time but I have to. I can't be in two places at once.
Sunday, June 28, 2015
June 28
This is just a quick update. Sidney is with her Georgia Grandma, Kirk's mom, in Florida. I dropped her off at the airport Tuesday. As I was backing out my parking space someone else backed into me. Yeah. There is just a small dent in the fender of the Prius. One of many dents.
I got the landscaping lights put in yesterday. It wasn't hard but it did take a while. I wanted to make sure I got it on the first go. It took about 3 and a half hours and I had to go get more wire. I think it looks nice and I am a little proud of myself. Today I am going to go help a friend move.
My friend was here a while back and took some fun shots of Shandy, Sidney and Stormy. I couldn't resist putting the pets in both with their tongues out. And the hummingbird shots were really cool because it slowed down the wings so you could see them. At the bottom are a couple of pictures of the lights, one under each tree and 4 down lights. And Kirk got to see her dad a couple of times two weeks ago. They took Stormy also and had a nice time.
It will be another busy week at work but at least it's only a four day week. Hope everyone has a great 4th of July.
I got the landscaping lights put in yesterday. It wasn't hard but it did take a while. I wanted to make sure I got it on the first go. It took about 3 and a half hours and I had to go get more wire. I think it looks nice and I am a little proud of myself. Today I am going to go help a friend move.
My friend was here a while back and took some fun shots of Shandy, Sidney and Stormy. I couldn't resist putting the pets in both with their tongues out. And the hummingbird shots were really cool because it slowed down the wings so you could see them. At the bottom are a couple of pictures of the lights, one under each tree and 4 down lights. And Kirk got to see her dad a couple of times two weeks ago. They took Stormy also and had a nice time.
It will be another busy week at work but at least it's only a four day week. Hope everyone has a great 4th of July.
Sunday, June 21, 2015
Happy Father's Day
This was to say the least a bit of a difficult Father's Day. Kirk has no concept of the day and of course no memory of anything you tell him. It has just resulted in us being a little sad. Sidney had a recital at an Assisted Living facility and there was a men's accappella choir. It was something Kirk was interested in and it made me think of his beautiful voice.
So I forgot to write about something that happened when I had to take Kirk tot he doctor two weeks ago. He kind of got mis-placed. He rode the van from Rainbow House down tot he Medical Center. The van was to arrive at the Health Science Center at 9 and I was there 15 minutes early. I waited for 30 minutes and started to panic. I called Rainbow House and they had put him on the van. I called the van place and they said that he was to be dropped off where I was. They said they dropped him off. In complete panic I went into the lobby and there he was. The staff at the clinic saw him and saw I wasn't there so they went and got him. My blood pressure was a little high.
Sidney went to camp at Mo Ranch a presbyterian camp near Kerrville. She had a great time. I was concerned about the adjustments she has had to make following Kirk's accident but she did fine and wants to go back. It was so much better than her first experience with camp a few years ago.
She had horse camp this week, 3 hours a day each day. She had some bumps with that in part to coming off the other camp high and adjusting to reality. We had a friend all week helping cart Sidney around and keep me in order. She was able to take Sidney to see Kirk twice during the week. I also decided Sidney needed to go back to swimming to get worn out because she was sassing me. But the pool was 35 minutes from the house in good weather. It happened that I ended up driving her there in an awful flooding rainstorm. We got there and she swam 2000 meters. My friend and I enjoyed the very nice gym and all was better. And it wasn't raining much on the way home.
I am taking a Spanish class. Two nights a week for three weeks, 2.5 hours each class. Its a lot to manage but I am learning and hoping to have a little bit of Spanish before getting to Peru. I am doing pretty good with nouns but struggling with verbs. I can make little cheats for nouns like cama is similar to casa and there is a bed in a casa. I know its silly but it is working. I have all my numbers and at least 75 nouns. We've also been conjugating verbs which I get but isn't easy to remember on the fly.
Speaking of rain will it ever stop. I know I am thankful but wet always.
Sidney is off to Grandma's this week. She leaves Tuesday and will be gone for about 3 weeks. I'll go get her from Houston when she gets back. She'll fly in there and spend a few days with friends and we will do some birthday stuff.
I am getting better at grilling. I have made steaks twice. Tonight's was the biggest sirloin ever. It was huge. I cut the t-bone off for a friend and cooked that to well done. The rest was medium to medium rare. I also made shish kabobs twice. They are pretty easy. And little mess to clean-up. However Sidney won't eat pork anymore. She is in love with a pig named Crispy Bacon and thinks pigs are brilliant. Hey, more bacon for me.
Parodies from 'Frozen'
for the first time in forever, it's not raining yet!
for the first time in forever I can fill the bird feeder without getting wet!
- Sidney (for the first time in forever)
don't let them in don't let them see
be the blue sky you always had to be
conceal don't feel
don't let them know!
well now they know!
let it rain!
let it rain!
turn away from the sun and storm!
let it rain. let it rain!
here i fly, in the height of the sky
so let the storm rage on!
the rain never bothered me anyway!
- Storm Cloud (let it go)
So I forgot to write about something that happened when I had to take Kirk tot he doctor two weeks ago. He kind of got mis-placed. He rode the van from Rainbow House down tot he Medical Center. The van was to arrive at the Health Science Center at 9 and I was there 15 minutes early. I waited for 30 minutes and started to panic. I called Rainbow House and they had put him on the van. I called the van place and they said that he was to be dropped off where I was. They said they dropped him off. In complete panic I went into the lobby and there he was. The staff at the clinic saw him and saw I wasn't there so they went and got him. My blood pressure was a little high.
Sidney went to camp at Mo Ranch a presbyterian camp near Kerrville. She had a great time. I was concerned about the adjustments she has had to make following Kirk's accident but she did fine and wants to go back. It was so much better than her first experience with camp a few years ago.
She had horse camp this week, 3 hours a day each day. She had some bumps with that in part to coming off the other camp high and adjusting to reality. We had a friend all week helping cart Sidney around and keep me in order. She was able to take Sidney to see Kirk twice during the week. I also decided Sidney needed to go back to swimming to get worn out because she was sassing me. But the pool was 35 minutes from the house in good weather. It happened that I ended up driving her there in an awful flooding rainstorm. We got there and she swam 2000 meters. My friend and I enjoyed the very nice gym and all was better. And it wasn't raining much on the way home.
I am taking a Spanish class. Two nights a week for three weeks, 2.5 hours each class. Its a lot to manage but I am learning and hoping to have a little bit of Spanish before getting to Peru. I am doing pretty good with nouns but struggling with verbs. I can make little cheats for nouns like cama is similar to casa and there is a bed in a casa. I know its silly but it is working. I have all my numbers and at least 75 nouns. We've also been conjugating verbs which I get but isn't easy to remember on the fly.
Speaking of rain will it ever stop. I know I am thankful but wet always.
Sidney is off to Grandma's this week. She leaves Tuesday and will be gone for about 3 weeks. I'll go get her from Houston when she gets back. She'll fly in there and spend a few days with friends and we will do some birthday stuff.
I am getting better at grilling. I have made steaks twice. Tonight's was the biggest sirloin ever. It was huge. I cut the t-bone off for a friend and cooked that to well done. The rest was medium to medium rare. I also made shish kabobs twice. They are pretty easy. And little mess to clean-up. However Sidney won't eat pork anymore. She is in love with a pig named Crispy Bacon and thinks pigs are brilliant. Hey, more bacon for me.
Parodies from 'Frozen'
for the first time in forever, it's not raining yet!
for the first time in forever I can fill the bird feeder without getting wet!
- Sidney (for the first time in forever)
don't let them in don't let them see
be the blue sky you always had to be
conceal don't feel
don't let them know!
well now they know!
let it rain!
let it rain!
turn away from the sun and storm!
let it rain. let it rain!
here i fly, in the height of the sky
so let the storm rage on!
the rain never bothered me anyway!
- Storm Cloud (let it go)
Sunday, June 7, 2015
Graduation
The first graduation has occurred. Sidney graduated from 5th grade on Thursday and will be off to middle school in the fall. I am really, really proud of her. She kept her grades up and did fabulously on her STAAR tests, scoring above the advanced level on all three tests. And it was such a hard year. Kirk's accident was only 5 days after she started 5th grade and a few months after we uprooted her life to move to San Antonio. And she stayed Sidney through it all. Because of her hard work she won the President's Education Awards Program Outstanding Academic Excellence award which is awarded to 5th grade students who maintain above a 90 percent average in all classes, have at least one STAAR test with above an advanced score and demonstrate outstanding citizenship. Did I say I was proud!
We also had a little party at the house Friday. It was really nice to have a house full of guests and everyone chipped in. Sidney was pretty funny though. She didn't like people being here after 9 pm. She kept whispering to me that they should leave, it was bed time. But for a change I had what I needed and she finally fell asleep. She quizzed me later about when they left.
We had our realtor over for dinner Saturday. It was nice to see her again. I made a meal far too huge for three. I officially need to stop cooking. I have run out of storage materials. All of my Tupperware is occupied.
I went into the computer room last night and there was brown liquid dripping down the wall. It took a while to figure out what it was. One of Kirk's collector Coca-Cola cans had developed a small leak and was dripping down the wall. I think it took at least a few days to drip off the shelf. It was really nasty.
I made homemade tomato soup tonight. I had tomatoes and onions left over from the dinner party and Sidney isn't here to eat the tomatoes. It actually turned out really good but I burned the whole palm of my hand. I put the soup in the blender to puree and it was too full. Boiling hot soup came out the top onto my hand, as well as the wall and floor. My hand is sore but OK.
Sidney is at camp this week. She is at Mo Ranch, about an hour and a half away, towards Kerrville. The drive over was really pretty and really curvy. I am having a hard time adjusting to her being gone. Not quite sure what to do with myself. I do start a Spanish class Tuesday night. It is 6 nights, Tuesday and Thursday night for the next three weeks. Preparation for Peru.
We also had a little party at the house Friday. It was really nice to have a house full of guests and everyone chipped in. Sidney was pretty funny though. She didn't like people being here after 9 pm. She kept whispering to me that they should leave, it was bed time. But for a change I had what I needed and she finally fell asleep. She quizzed me later about when they left.
We had our realtor over for dinner Saturday. It was nice to see her again. I made a meal far too huge for three. I officially need to stop cooking. I have run out of storage materials. All of my Tupperware is occupied.
I went into the computer room last night and there was brown liquid dripping down the wall. It took a while to figure out what it was. One of Kirk's collector Coca-Cola cans had developed a small leak and was dripping down the wall. I think it took at least a few days to drip off the shelf. It was really nasty.
I made homemade tomato soup tonight. I had tomatoes and onions left over from the dinner party and Sidney isn't here to eat the tomatoes. It actually turned out really good but I burned the whole palm of my hand. I put the soup in the blender to puree and it was too full. Boiling hot soup came out the top onto my hand, as well as the wall and floor. My hand is sore but OK.
Sidney is at camp this week. She is at Mo Ranch, about an hour and a half away, towards Kerrville. The drive over was really pretty and really curvy. I am having a hard time adjusting to her being gone. Not quite sure what to do with myself. I do start a Spanish class Tuesday night. It is 6 nights, Tuesday and Thursday night for the next three weeks. Preparation for Peru.
Monday, June 1, 2015
Another Move
I got Kirk moved on Wednesday from Brookdale to Rainbow House. How is that Brookdale seemed so right and turned out so wrong? Was I hung up on a name? I think it was some promise that wasn't met, some dream that will not be reality, some desire to have him close. The head staff, the Marketting Manager, the Operations Manager and the head nurse all quit or moved just after Kirk moved there. So many times I went to him and he was unwashed and wearing unclean clothes. Even the last day, Wednesday when I went to get him he smelled badly and was wearing the clothes I put him in on Monday.
Rainbow House seemed so overwhelming on my first visit. It is small and not new but it is clean and safe. Most residents are in wheel chairs and some are much lower functioning than Kirk. I think I wasn't ready to face reality at that time. It was scary and it was final. But now I understand the special needs of TBI survivors, the reality of where we are, and the dedication of the staff. They want him to be happy and healthy and they know how to and are committed to making that happen.
We stopped and got his transportation ID on the way to Rainbow House. That will allow him nearly free transport to doctors appointments and day care if we start that. And then we were at Rainbow House. His new furntiure is nice and comfortable and fits in his room. I've hung lots of pictures and will hang some more. I think he has everything he needs.
He has had at least one episode of super frustration and the staff managed in in such a way that it was over in seconds. Brookdale would have made a huge deal out of it and it isn't a big deal at all. He plays basketball every day and they are doing memeory games to try to help him learn peoples names. Also on the morning after his first night they could tell me it took him a while to fall asleep but that he slept all night. I felt so much better knowing that he has that level of care. Everyone is for the most part peaceful. He does have a door that goes directly outside. That is alarmed in case he decides to go walk about. And he lives by a schedule. No surprises. We visited him this weekend and that went fine although he was sad when he realized we were leaving without him. Ultimately we snuck out and I am sure he forgot about us in an instant.
Sidney and I have had ups and downs. One up was her fabulous STAAR Test results. She exceeded the advanced expectations on all three tests, math, reading and science. And school will be out in 3 days. Downs are fighting over meals and expectations. She is still swimming and playing piano. And of course riding her beloved horse.
I had some success with Craig's List this weekend. I sold the bike Kirk had is accident on. The bike was virtually undamaged. And I was happy to see it go. Now for the other one. And I am adding the golf clubs and other stuff.
We will get our intern at work tomorrow. I am anxious to get a new young person in our group, even if it is only for a couple of months. And we get to go to Top Golf!
Sidney graduates from Elementary School on Thursday. I can't believe how fast time has gone since starting school in Norway. This has been such a difficult year for her and I am so proud of her. She has managed to get through with good grades and some bumps and bruises. And she has kept her sweet heart and loving soul.
I am having a few friends over both Friday and Saturday and Sidney is off to camp on Sunday. I start Spanish class next Tuesday to prepare for our Peru mission trip.
Thank you for your continued support and prayers. We could not stay afloat without you.
Rainbow House seemed so overwhelming on my first visit. It is small and not new but it is clean and safe. Most residents are in wheel chairs and some are much lower functioning than Kirk. I think I wasn't ready to face reality at that time. It was scary and it was final. But now I understand the special needs of TBI survivors, the reality of where we are, and the dedication of the staff. They want him to be happy and healthy and they know how to and are committed to making that happen.
We stopped and got his transportation ID on the way to Rainbow House. That will allow him nearly free transport to doctors appointments and day care if we start that. And then we were at Rainbow House. His new furntiure is nice and comfortable and fits in his room. I've hung lots of pictures and will hang some more. I think he has everything he needs.
He has had at least one episode of super frustration and the staff managed in in such a way that it was over in seconds. Brookdale would have made a huge deal out of it and it isn't a big deal at all. He plays basketball every day and they are doing memeory games to try to help him learn peoples names. Also on the morning after his first night they could tell me it took him a while to fall asleep but that he slept all night. I felt so much better knowing that he has that level of care. Everyone is for the most part peaceful. He does have a door that goes directly outside. That is alarmed in case he decides to go walk about. And he lives by a schedule. No surprises. We visited him this weekend and that went fine although he was sad when he realized we were leaving without him. Ultimately we snuck out and I am sure he forgot about us in an instant.
Sidney and I have had ups and downs. One up was her fabulous STAAR Test results. She exceeded the advanced expectations on all three tests, math, reading and science. And school will be out in 3 days. Downs are fighting over meals and expectations. She is still swimming and playing piano. And of course riding her beloved horse.
I had some success with Craig's List this weekend. I sold the bike Kirk had is accident on. The bike was virtually undamaged. And I was happy to see it go. Now for the other one. And I am adding the golf clubs and other stuff.
We will get our intern at work tomorrow. I am anxious to get a new young person in our group, even if it is only for a couple of months. And we get to go to Top Golf!
Sidney graduates from Elementary School on Thursday. I can't believe how fast time has gone since starting school in Norway. This has been such a difficult year for her and I am so proud of her. She has managed to get through with good grades and some bumps and bruises. And she has kept her sweet heart and loving soul.
I am having a few friends over both Friday and Saturday and Sidney is off to camp on Sunday. I start Spanish class next Tuesday to prepare for our Peru mission trip.
Thank you for your continued support and prayers. We could not stay afloat without you.
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